a blog for women… I'm just sayin'

A woman goes to a doctor to discuss her husband’s infertility problem. The doctor says, “Just give your husband these Viagra pills in his next meal, and stand back.”
The woman goes home and hands the pills to her cook who was preparing dinner for a dinner party later that night. The woman says to the cook, “Just put two of these in my husband’s dinner tonight.”
As the woman walks out of the kitchen the cook thinks, “Sure, like I got nothing better to do,” and she throws the whole bunch into the soup.
As the guests were sitting down to dinner, the cook comes out of the kitchen and advises the lady of the house that she must speak to her in that there is a big problem in the kitchen. The lady of the house follows the cook into the kitchen and demands to know what is going on.
The cook admits to throwing all the pills into the soup and cries, “I don’t know what to do, the meat balls have doubled in size, and the vermicelli is standing straight up!”

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Q: What do Disney World & Viagra have in common?
A: They both make you wait an hour for a two-minute ride!

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A man and his wife went to the pharmacy to pick up his prescription for Viagra. Seeing the $10 per pill price his wife was astonished – but then realized “it’s only going to cost us $30 per year”

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An elderly man went into his local pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to refill his prescription for Viagra. The pharmacist said, “No problem, sir. How many would you like?”
The man answered, “Just a few, maybe 3, but cut each one into 5 pieces.”
The pharmacist said, “It’s not going to work that well, cutting the Viagra that many times.”
The elderly man said, “That’s all right. I don’t need vigrx for sex anymore as I am over 80 years old. I just want it to stick out far enough so I don’t pee on my shoes.”

Rambo Alert – TwitterMoms – Glue Dots Oh My!! I was so excited to be a part of the Glue Dots Summer Craft event!

The Glue Dots Project immediately brought to mind my niece Erika. There is a story behind my excitement so please indulge me, as a share my parenting story first.

You see I have a wonderful, loving niece who as a teen, had a passion for scrap booking and crafts. We spent many nights scrap booking together. Today,  Erika loves to do crafts with her three year old baby girl. Of course that makes Lulu, as well call her, my great niece. I am so pleased with and darn proud of my niece; she is a wonderful mom and has a beautiful, well behaved, and charismatic daughter. No one in the family would have ever imagined her life would turn out this way. You see, my niece was one of those unruly teens and I was the wicked aunt who took up the challenge of taming her. She lived with our family for some time, and after moving out continued working in our office until she graduated from high school. With due diligence we kept her close, rallied for family support, and expelled more love than could be imagined. My niece went on to married a fine man, further her bookkeeping skills, and give us precious  Lulu!

When I told Erika about the Glue Dots Summer Bonding Project she was excited too! “Another project for Lulu and I, oh yeah we can do that!” Without further delay I would like to share with you Erika’s quick and inexpensive Glue Dots Summer Bonding project, suitable for boys and girls alike. These cute canisters serve an abundance of purposes, including a lovely way to store just about anything, fun and economical project to create with kids, and a great way to recycle cans, jars, or boxes.

Materials:

glue dots (craft size)

crystal light can

12×12 scrap book paper (on hand)

green ribbon (on hand)

buttons (on hand)

Assembly

Clean a crystal light canister (or any can you have lying around) dry well

Cut paper to size of can

Using the Go dispenser, roll glue dots along the edge of the paper.

Apply Glue Dots to container and continue to do so every 2 inches.

Be sure to use glue dots along the paper crease.

Apply ribbon to cover paper crease.

On the opposite side of ribbon use one glue dot to hold ribbon in place, wrap around the can and tie.

Decorate as desired based on use or by theme

The buttons and foam letters spelling out “buttons” were attached with one glue dot each.

Try using an empty Grated Parmesan Cheese Canister to use as a Ribbon Dispenser!

Erika authors  Deals I have Received, sharing coupons, matching deals, and frugal tips.

Glue Dots Go Dispenser is quite convenient for younger children to roll onto paper. The glue dots have great substance and the adhesive is very durable. The spacing of Glue Dots make placement easy and consistent.

I would like to thank Glue Dots and Twittermoms for this opportunity. I wrote this blog post while participating in the TwitterMoms and Glue Dots blogging contest to be eligible to receive a $30 gift card. For more information on how you can participate, click here for Twittermoms or visit Glue Dots Facebook fan page.

Age spots, aka liver spots are quite annoying let me tell you. These buggers seemed to simply appear one day and continue to pop up randomly. I think this aging symptom is worse than grey hair. What do you think?

Age spots typically develop in fair skinned people like myself, lucky me. They range in size from a freckle to more than one centimeter and can be grouped, looking more pronounced and ugly. Of course, years of sun basking without UV protection increase the amount of age spots. Wish someone had told me that back in the day. I mean I did use sun block but may have opted out of being on the beach simply to tan had I known about these brown blotches.

There are many over the counter bleaching creams available to lighten age spots. With the pigment being at the base of the topmost layer of skin, the epidermis, treatments will have to penetrate that layer. According to the Mayo Clinic, prescribed bleaching creams used in combination with retinoid, a chemical that is structured similar to vitamin A, will have a greater effect. In either case, age spots should fade slowly over a period.

It is so hard to know what creams might work and what are bull. Plus, my skin is really sensitive. Maybe you all can shed some more light on the subject.

Have you used age spot creams or had medical treatment for them? Do you have a recommendation?

Audrey Meadows & Jackie Gleason – The Honeymooners

Alice: Boy, you men kill me; you’re all alike. You want us women to bow and scrape at your feet. You men just think that you own this world.
Ralph: Yeah, but you women get revenge. You marry us!

eBaum’s World

A man had a hemorrhoid and badly needed cream. He would be so embarrassed to go and buy the best hemorrhoid treatment cream at his local pharmacy for obvious reasons.

What should he do to get the cream without stealing, buying it at the register, and not be embarrassed?

He should buy the cream along with a box of tampons! He is not embarrassed, and he looks like a wonderful husband.

Lucille Ball – I Love Lucy

“Oh Ethel did you ever wish there was something else to marry besides men?”

Rodney Dangerfield

“I’m sitting on top of the world, and I’ve got hemorrhoids.”

My wife made me join a bridge club. I jump off next Tuesday.

“With my wife, I get no respect. I fell asleep with a cigarette in my hand. She lit it.”

Jerry Seinfeld

Men want the same thing from women that they want from their underwear… a little support, comfort, and freedom.

BUTT (but) n
Female: The body part that every item of clothing manufactured makes “look bigger.”
Male: What you slap when someone’s scored a touchdown, home run, or goal. Also good for mooning.