a blog for women… I'm just sayin'

The corny one line statements concerning weight loss really crack me up!

• A moment on the lips, forever on the hips!

• Calories In = Calories Out!

• The first three letters in the word diet is DIE so live carefully.

• Touch your toes, and touch your toes, AND WISH YOU SKIPPED THOSE OREO’S.”

• Won’t power is better than will power.

• Stressed spelled backwards is desserts.

• Exercise, eat healthy, and die anyway.

• If you don’t watch your figure, no one else will either.

• Remember who holds the fork.

My number one and so true funny weight loss line is …

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Being overweight is a huge burden on the body, both physically and mentally. I remember my aunt always being on a diet. It seemed she was fanatical about her weight and constantly worried about it. She tried every new diet that came along. Diet formulas like the grapefruit diet, once meal a day diet, and the famous Adkins diet too. In looking back, I think she spent the better part of twenty years trying to loose weight and keep the weight off. Finally, she turned to diet pills to help curb her appetite. A diet pill that works can be a great tool when used properly. Portion control, eliminating junk food, and exercise along with the used of diet pills were the keys to my aunt’s success. She is in her early seventies, and no longer has a need for diet pills yet still maintains her weight. She is healthy and happy, asserting still today that diet pills were a vital part of her path to success.

Just in case my aunt story didn’t inspire you, here is a diet pill joke to make you laugh.

Two women are waiting in line at the grocery store. One woman says with excitement to the other, “Have you heard about the new diet pill?” The second woman replies with an eye roll, “I’m married to one.” he he he

SHOPPING MATH ~ Black Friday Fun

A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.

A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn’t need.

hehehe

Thought I would share the deals I have access to for black Friday shopping. Browse in advance, compare prices, and be prepared for the busiest shopping day of the year. I do receive credit for sales generated from my links. If there is a deal that you intend on taking advantage of listed here, please do come back on Black Friday or Cyber Monday and use my links!

Black Friday Deals – Children and Family

• 11/27/2009 Black Friday ONLY – 50% Off ALL DVDs, Flash Cards, and CDs With the Purchase of $25 Or More at Signing Time

• 11/24/2009 End Date:11/30/2009 Enter coupon codeFREE49and receive free shipping on any toy(s)

• 11/27/2009 End Date:11/30/2009 Take an Additional 16% Off Magazines

Black Friday Deals – Sports Attire and Sporting Goods

• 11/30/2009 Cyber Monday Only – Take an Extra $30 Off Carrom Air Hockey Table. Applies only to SKU CRM1012

• 11/27/2009 End Date: 12/01/2009 Take an Extra 15% Off Any Game Table Set. This is specific to playing card style tables.

• 11/27/2009 End Date: 12/06/2009 $50 Off and Table over $500 Includes Poker Tables, Air Hockey, Pool, Ping Pong etc.

Additionally, I have posted more Sports related DEALS  at the Outdoor Woman website. Compare prices and view the deals in advance! Sales begin on Black Friday and most continue through Cyber Monday. Products on sale include ski equipment, cycling gear, bikes, skating gear, helmets and all types of sports attire.

I hope you find these useful and competitively priced.

Thanks for your support!

Jake is lying on the bed, so sick that he’s going to die any minute now.. His wife Susan is sitting next to the bed with tears flowing from her eyes.. holding Jake’s hand.

Jake: “My dear wife, Susan…”

Susan: “Hush now Jake, my dear husband… you must rest…”

Jake: “I have a confession to make…”

Susan: “There’s nothing to confess… Everything’s fine, sleep.” (sob)

Jake: “No, I want to die peacefully… Susan, I had affairs with your sister, with your mother, you best friend…”

Susan: “I know… that’s why i poisoned you…”

A man dies and goes to Heaven. He gets to meet GOD and asks GOD if he can ask him a few questions.

“Sure,” GOD says, “Go right ahead”.

“OK,” the man says. “Why did you make women so pretty?”

GOD says, “So you would like them.”

“OK,” the guy says. “But how come you made them so beautiful?”

“So you would LOVE them”, GOD replies.

The man ponders a moment and then asks, “But why did you make them such airheads?”

GOD says, “So they would love you!”